Fear Not

Life can be like a roller coaster, up and down, exciting, and nerve wracking. You may feel like you want to get off mid ride or maybe you wish the ride would last forever.

Days and nights can be filled with the same emotions, and as I realized today, it can change minute by minute. Unlike a roller coaster though, the twists and turns of life that lie before us, are unknown.

When the phone rang today and I saw it was Ella’s teacher, I thought maybe she was sick, but instead we talked about other things that were going on in Ella’s world today. Most of these things made me sad for her and to be honest, I wondered how much more I could take.

I’m exhausted from Eli being sick and having him not sleep through the night. All the things that come with taking care of someone who is sick added to his regular needs would make anyone tired. Add the recent phone conversation to the mix and, well, let’s just say I was running on empty.

Thankfully the roller coaster was on its way to the fun part as I got an email from Ella’s coach not long after. As I read the email, I thought just how quickly things can change over the course of a day, and I felt like I was thrown a bone that God knew I needed at that particular moment. Coach wrote that she would like to have Ella be one of the captains in one of the last upcoming home games of the season. My heart was suddenly thrust from exhaustion to excitement at the thought of this special moment for Ella and suddenly I couldn’t wait to see her after practice.

I could sense her excitement when she got into the car when I picked her up and my momma heart was at peace. She came home excited to tell Hut and asked if Eli would be better by then so we could all be at her game! Now, she doesn’t even know what she will be doing as one of the captains, but it doesn’t matter because the moment will be about her, not Eli, Eric or Evan but about Ella, and God knows she needed that.

As I lay here tonight I can’t help but feel thankful for not just the exciting and fun part of the ride, but for it all, because without the valleys, I don’t think I could ever appreciate the complete joy that the peaks bring. 💗

~ by Rebecca on October 19, 2022.

Posted in Along the way, Diagnosed, Life after diagnosis, living, the ride of my life
Tags: caregiver, Covid, day by day, eli and ella, Eli and Ellas Prayer Warriors, Eliandellasprayerwarriors, exhausted, God, journey, joy, life, metachromatic leukodystrophy, MLD, never give up, peaks and valleys, roller coaster, special needs, strength, ups and downs, warriors